OMFG I hate some people so rude......venting to the women and men with multiple children....

 Well to start off, let me mention our family situation: I have a son, 5 years old now, from a previous relationship. My fiance, soon to be husband, has three boys and one girl from two previous relationships...He is a few years older than me... The oldest of his four is 6yrs, the only little girl is 5, and he has two more boys one almost 4 and the other almost 3. Together we have one little boy and he will be 2 in Jan..We also have one more and final baby on the way, enough to finaly show, actually 21 weeks today...ANYWAYS...Right now we have our youngest, and three of his four children, one of his isnt related to the others so we do not get to see him all the time because of his mother...anyways....I went to the store today, and this has happened to me before, but still..urked me today...I went to the store for much needed groceries while my fiance was at work...and all the comments and looks have me furious....I had one lady double take come back and ask me with a very disaproving tone and look on her face if all of these were mine. Of course I proudly said OURS, yes and one on the way:D with a niice big fat smile on my face and a twinkle in my eye. After that the old hag walked off after shaking her head no at me in disaprovement, I kept smiling but still....HOW RUDE...whats so wrong with a big family? She wasnt the only one but she was the only one to speak up to me..Almost everyone looked at me like I was some used up whore...I think a lot of ppl assumed I was single, No ring yet...havent found the one I want lol...but still....What is wrong with that, whats wrong with a big family or being single and having a big family, you dont know if my love is passed away, left me, or called out for duty...and I got looks as if we were white trash...IF i was walkn round with just one or two kids, like normal for me, everyone's looks are completly different more in awe than disgust...Today though, they looked at me like I shouldnt have this many kids and its wrong...??? Its not like we are dirt poor..ya we have our tight times, mostly winter...but we do good, each of my kisd has their own bed, their own room, and crap load toys..too many lol..in fact we got more today lol....they have nice clothes..along with play clothes lol...they were clean, their hair was done..well little Sophie's was since she's the only one with hair lol..What they dont realize is those three older kids dont have any of this with their biological mom...she has no job, her husband has no job, they have no where to live, the kids live on a floor in the same room...always ifested with lice....neglected...never bathed...they have it bad there...I/WE take good care of them...I pick out all the lice as queasy as it makes me feel...I clean her head sores from the lice....I take them to the dr since they are always sick...I make sure they get bathed...I spend learning time with them....play time with them...and make sure they have clothes that fit and arent falling apart...I am in school...and their daddy is working...and when he gets laid off in winter...hes construction worker..I find a job to support us.....so what is so wrong with me??? .IDK...they were well behaved...except the two almost 3 yr old he was being typical two yr old lol....but I just dont see why I deserved these looks..why our babies deserved those looks...ON TOP OF IT...my two older sons went into bathroom and were having trouble with the door and an older man pushed them..literaly pushed them and said get in or out and then continued to harass them in the bathroom..I of course fed up for the day went in and said dont f**************** talk to my kids that way....yes I know I swore..in fact this whole thing was abnormal for me but due to my hormones and my combined responses of the day I just had my last straw hit and was not going to have my boys harrased while they tried to pee....JUST WRONG....he was fine until I told them to make sure they wash and he realized all those were mine thats when he started harrassing them....idk if was cuz he too felt I had to many..IDK..but my kids were doing nothing wrong they didnt even open their mouths..the six yr old was just tryn to help the 3 yr old wash his hands in the tall sinks and open the heavy door....I just dont understand....Im sorry..just not a good mood today..still need to finish shoppn but I just couldnt handle anymore and kids were hungry it was lunch time lol....Has anyone else felt this way..or deal with this...? Is it really that wrong...?? I thought all that mattered was love, happiness...and obviously that they are taken care of??? I even strive to make sure they arent spoiled wrotten and have manners...when I only have one or two with me I get soooo many compliments on how well behave they are and polite they are....as if because I am young they woudlnt be...urrrrr....o by the way I am only 24 almost 25 and look younger...maybe that has something to do with all of these looks and attitudes...I know it is with the shocked looks when people realize how polite and proper they are compared to how young I look and my style of clothing....and music....People are too judgemental....ugh...Maybe I am in the wrong..IDK anymore...this has got me a little depressed about this baby...how much more are we going to go through now...All i do is try for those kids...all i want is for them to be loved and happy....just breaks my heart they have to hear such rude stuff...especially since some of them are old enough to understand to a point....and it hurts their feelings..and mine...

Aww sorry! W are the same age, and while I just have two, one on the way though I'm not showing I get tons of looks. I do look very young, so I suppose that's why. I've learned that when people judge it's to take time from their own lives they are disappointed in. My hormones are all over the place too, gotta love pregnancy, but I just see how happy my children are and how good and know that I'm probably much happier than them. I'm a PA, have a degree in chemistry, Surgical technology and physics. I took dual credits in high school and had a bachelors degree by 20, graduate degree by my 24th birthday. I had my dd1 at 19, her p.o.s bio dad left and signed his rights over to me. I struggled to finish my last year of my undergrad but did it and she's the only thing that got me through. So, when they look at me and I get the "poor girl" or the "ugh ever heard of a condom" looks I want to shout my accomplishments at them be ause I worked so hard for that, I did it all myself. I met my DH and he helped me finish my grad. Now we have our dd2 and I just think Geeze we only have two, can't aging what it would be like when #3 gets here. Anyway what I mean is, big families or small, older moms or younger We will always be judged. All the pieces of papers in frames aside, the greatest and only thing I could give to this earth is my beautiful children and no one can make me feel bad about that!!!

You sound like you are such a caring and loving mom and a really good person too. I am sorry you were treated so rudely today. Some people are just insanely rude and miserable! Try no to let the Get you down because you are doing an excellent job!!

It takes somebody VERY special to form such a bond with children that arent bioligically theirs, and to do all the things that you do is outstanding!! Let them bloody look, our greatest critics in this life are our children, and only they have the right to let you know if you are getting it wrong, but it sounds like you have it SPOT ON!!!

I have 9 children, and while NOBODY will say a word to my face, I have a few very good friends who tell me which hypocritical imbeciles think its ok to talk about me behind my back, do I care, NO WAY... If they want to look/comment/talk about me behind my back, then obviously their own lives are not as exciting as mine :D...

U just keep doing what yr doing, and those children will thank you for it, you dont need anybody to tell you what a fantastic job you are doing, you only have to look at those kiddies to see that!!... well done you, it sounds like you have a family set up that 99% of the population would/SHOULD be jealous of... x

 Thank you all very much, you have made me feel much better about this whole situation. I hope it is because I am young and not because of my children because I am trying so hard to take good care of them. Obviously I didnt let anyone know that they offended me and kept on smiling and being proud for my sake and the childrens but it still hurts on a deep level...I just do not understand...I hate how judgemental people can be....if they only knew..then maybe they wouldnt judge me so hard...there are parts of me that wanted to scream it all out and just be acknowledge for how much i do for these kids but the other part of me does not accept others pitty and does not want my kids to think that they are a burden on me because they arent..It is hard at times especially not being their real mom but I love them so very much Id do anything for them I really would...If I woudlnt I wouldnt be doing what I do now for them...I really thank you all your words truly have made me feel better and more at ease and able to handle the judgement better...like i said maybe it is just hormones but it was very hard on me yesterday.

I think your family is beautiful. Dont worry about those negative people. They are just bitter & jealous & must lead boring lives if they have to make rude remarks. You sound like a wonderful Mum to all the kids. As long as you & the kids are happy dont worry about what others think.

 Thank you very much, we are happy and I have been so blessed! I cant wait for our family to be complete now and I think it was just one of those days the hormones just could not handle it lol...I have been much happier since then othen than stressed out of my mind lol. thank you all for your kind words of encouragement.